So, in the afternoon, after settling my sick little girl on the sofa for a nap, I slipped outside to sit on my deck and talk to the Lord, hoping that He had something to say to me. I've been running from the Lord. Why? Mostly fear - fear of rejection, fear of hearing nothing, fear of seeing His back turned against me because I still think it's about what I'm doing. I had twenty minutes before the oven timer was going to go off. I brought my Jesus Calling, silently daring God to speak to me through it. Here's what the day's entry said, "Don't be discouraged. I know your heart. Don't let feelings of failure weigh you down." About this time I had to laugh because not only does God totally have my number, He has arranged for me to read exactly what I need to hear. One of the scripture references at the bottom was Hebrews 4:14 -16. On my way there, verse 4:2 - the second part jumped out at me, "But the message they heard was of no value to them because those who heard did not combine it with faith." I have to choose to believe what God says about me. Here's what He tells me I need to do - this is Hebrews 4:16 - in my words, "We need to run to God's ruling seat of mercy full of confidence that He will receive us and give us the mercy and grace we so desperately need." That is what I intend to do. Run to His mercy. Believe that the blood of Jesus has covered all my failures once and for all. It is done. I choose to enter His rest. I choose to quit believing that His love for me varies with how well I'm doing my job, how much I weigh, or how clean my floors are.
Father God, please help us believe the wonderful truth that You receive us and our performance has no bearing on Your love for us. Help us get this Lord, because I'm still not sure we really do. In Jesus' Name. Amen.